I thought I would start this blog with some background information on my 25....I mean five year old Olivia. My O, as I call her, had to start out life as a tough cookie. I was 19 when I got pregnant with Olivia and the news of my pregnancy, to my surprise, led to my becoming a single mom. When she was born I was 20 and even with the best intentions a 20 year old woman doesn't always know what she is doing and doesn't have an abundance of patience. She got passed around a lot since I worked almost full time and went to school which in some ways I believe benefited her a great deal thanks to an amazing great grandmother who took no small part in raising her. When she was a year and a half we moved into an apartment together which created a bond between us that only a single parent could understand. ( I would like to clear up that sadly there are plenty of married woman out there that can be classified as single mothers)
O learned to be quite independent at a very young age. She was quite a site at two years old helping mommy carry groceries from the car. She gave up her love affair with pacifiers in one day, threw away her bottles in one night and was fully potty trained within a week. She seemed to understand that it was just me and her and she was going to have to pull her wait around here if we were going to keep our sanity and get anything done. This might have something to do with the fact that she now considers herself an equal party in our household. This has caused much grief for my awesome husband and I.
O is the kind of kid who lets us know when we are wrong. Who yells out at dinner that she has a terrible life and whom has called her step father an a@#hole on many of occasion, then proceeded to inform me that while she knows this is inappropriate he really was being one and deserved it. She has given herself a time out after committing an offense with a "what are you going to do about it know" look on her face. When she doesn't want to clean up she informs me that she does not need all of these things and I can give them away, which I have no doubt that she is being serious. She demands to be heard and questions all authority often "giving in" on the pretence that she has to listen to us even though we do not know what we are talking about simply because she is our daughter which is not an easy task. This has lead to some insanity for all parties involved.
Along with O's outright stubbornness comes and amazing capacity for insight and love. She cries at thunderstorms because they are beautiful as well as animal shelter adds while she declares that "if we do not help them mommy, who will?" She tells me I'm beautiful when I'm feeling like crap and throws in the occasional, "have you lost weight mommy?" purely for my happiness. She remembers to ask her Nana is she got the job she interviewed for because she knows that Nana really wanted it. She has an amazing amount of wisdom packed into a five year old body and sometimes she has me believing that she knows a little more then the rest of us about life. So with all that said it came as no surprise to me when she asked me if we could go on a date.
It had to be somewhere fancy, somewhere we can wear high heals and dresses and have a glass of wine. When I explained to her that she could not have a glass of wine she replied, "That's ok mommy, I'll just have a beer then." We looked on the Internet and settled on the Cosmo Cafe downtown, mostly because their website had a picture of women wearing high heals. So this Friday we hoped in the car with Aunt G in tow and headed out for girls night. We had big girl drinks, Shirley temples, and enjoyed some fine dining which means that she ate the bread and one of my french fries. She told the waitress she looked beautiful and informed an older gentleman in a suit that he was handsome. We followed it up with ice cream at Dairy Queen and a sleep over with Aunt G where she had an amazing time.
While I watched her ham it up and flirt shamelessly with the water boy I realized that O is and has always been one of my best friends and favorite people. I also realized that this has very little to do with the fact that she is my daughter and much more to do with the fact that I really like her. As I would say after meeting someone new among friends, "Olivia is good people." It feels really awesome to love your kids but it feels indescribable to really LIKE them.
You two make me happy and you continually impress me. Olivia will appreciate someday that you like her. My mother tells me, "I have always liked you," and somehow it's almost better than her saying, "I love you."
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