Hear me ROAR!

Assertive is not a word I would use to describe myself in many situations. Assertive with my husband, kids and Friends..... well that's a different story but I'm emotionally invested in them so it's easy, or that's my excuse. Assertive with rude waitresses, bad hairdressers and the like I am not. I'm the kind of girl that cringes when someone complains at a restaurant and that does not say a word when the manicurist is causing me great pain. See I've always felt too guilty to speak up, always put myself in their shoes. I also hate ungrateful whiners who behave as if nothing meets their standards. In all efforts to avoid this behavior I've become something worse.....a push over, a wimp! While I'm still realistic about the fact that this probably is not going to change anytime soon there is one thing I have become sure of, one thing I'm not ashamed to stand up for. My children's well being.

Unfortunately this has not always been true in the past. I've let doctor's get too rough with Olivia and put her, well us, in painful situations that resulted in 11 stitches in mommies lip as well as a trip to the ER to get that pesky bead out of her nose. I have not always asked questions about things I should have had explained to me which resulted in a lot of guilt and frustration on my part. After countless times feeling completely left out of the loop and not empowered about my daughter's care I've learned a thing or two. If there is one circumstance where it is completely acceptable to be a demanding and God forbid, whiny person, it's when it comes to being a kick ass no BS mommy.

I took O to the dentist today and the minute I walked in I got the bad mommy juju. I knew something did not feel right and it made me sick to my stomach. It didn't help that I had never seen my daughter on Valium before and while a little funny it was also very frightening to me. I decided to go back with her and when I asked if I should stay I was told, "not if you are going to baby her and make a big deal about it." Red flag number one. Still I struggled with giving them the benefit of the doubt and got the hubby to step in instead. Not ten minutes later I was being called back and informed that because she was crying they would not finish and listened to the assistant make my five year old feel guilty about being scared. I walked out with my half numbed and doped up daughter whom was crying because she kept biting her tongue. I held my composer as I walked out to the car and proceeded to break down on the way home. They treated my baby like crap and I knew it from the beginning. Needless to say we will not be returning to that place and we will be "interviewing" other dentists for the position because if you are taking care of my daughter you dammed well better try to impress me.

I'm my children's advocate, their voice. It's my job to be a pushy stubborn woman when it comes to their well being. My husband made a good point today when he explained that even if we are being unfair and not giving them a chance that's a whole hell of a lot better then compromising the girl's care. So while I might still eat cold soup with a smile on my face and tip the lady who gave me a modern mullet, I will not pacify someone who is not treating my child right. What is "right" for your child is up to you and a standard that need not be lowered to avoid making a scene. I'm a calm and patient woman in many circumstances but if you screw with my kid you will hear me roar and watch out for the claws. Oh yeah and call me Assertive if you must, I'm a mommy and it's kind of part of the job =)